A LITTLE GIFT FROM GOD = YIKES

Patricia - I have four boys. FOUR? FOUR! (How did THAT happen?) I graduated Photography school in 2003. I had the first one in 2001 and I’m just scratching the surface of doing business full-time again. It’s like Yoda says: “No! Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.”

sarah danaher - sooooooooo so proud of you for thinking through this so well, Promise. praying for you and Brian as you figure out timing and such. I was also homeschooled, and I’m the oldest of nine kids, and when I look at my parents’ life, it completely overwhelms me (they still have five at home— I’m 27, the youngest is 10, and they’re still homeschooling). but what they say is that you’re never actually READY… God just gives enough grace. (they also say that some people are “full” with just one child, so it’s okay that I don’t want a dozen. haha.)

because when it comes down to it, we’re fully dependent on God, and should be constantly aware of that. anything that reminds us of that dependence is a good thing. =)

Jasmine* - Lah-lah-love.

Alyssa Armstrong - I have two little ones…one boy, one girl. Both of them are under the age of 4. My husband is in the military and works full-time on base (long hours, deployments, you get the picture) and I am currently trying to get my photography business up and running. It’s really difficult and overwhelming at times. But as I’m sure you’re going to hear a lot, NOTHING can prepare you for becoming a parent. You’re never truly “ready”…but all in all, parenthood is the greatest thing to ever happen to me!

Regardless of what happens, you can still find a way to make your dreams come true. It’s all about balance, prioritizing, and of course, having lots and lots of fun!

PS – as I typed this, my children decided to take out the entire contents of the toy box and are now “swimming” in toys. Looks like a fun day is in store! <3

Tori - oooh, girl. i TOTALLY FEEL YOU. it’s scarrrry to think through. and it’s super hard to realize that the business i’m growing & loving might (no, WILL) have to take a back seat to motherhood, once it arrives. it’s tough knowing that there’s no turning back, and so many things will be sacrificed. but, just like you…in the past 6 months i’ve realized how selfish and fearful these thoughts have been. and after reading “tuesdays with morrie” was reminded that at the end of my life, i don’t want my legacy to have been my work. i truly don’t. because it’s not what will matter. and when i think of how much i was blessed and shaped by the loving, selfless devotion of my parents i know THAT is truly an impacting role to play for someone. so, it’s still scary, but i’m more and more looking forward to the exciting journey that it will be when God gifts us with a baby. (we’re hoping that might be next year, actually….

like sarah said, God gives JUST the right amount of grace, when we need it. and i’m SO grateful for that!

Carolyn - love this post, and I totally agree with Sarah. I love how you put things in to perspective. So here is my input:

1. First, I think it all boils down to discerning what God’s will is for you personally at this particular time in your life. And He will show you the way one step at a time.

2. Prioritizing, for me this means realizing that there may be (and have been) things I need to sacrifice for my family. Does not mean that I can never do the things I enjoy, but not as much as before.

3. Our “Schedule”: We are just starting our family with one 19 month old. We work together and from home (as wedding photographers), so my husband focuses mostly on work during “work hours” and I mostly focus on being a caretaker for our son. We have some designated time during the week when the boy goes to Grandmas so that we can have time to work together without having to work late at night. We have client meetings in the evening after his bedtime and then of course on the weekends we are out photographing.

This is what works for us, for now. What will work in the future? When our son is older? When we have more kids? I don’t know. I’m just taking it one step at a time and trusting God will show us the way.

Laura Reaux - I think you know that Jeromy & I have FIVE little ones (ages 9-3) and we’re full-time photographers. I will tell you that it is a wild & crazy life… but a FUN, exciting & amazing journey. (I think the wild/hectic part is VERY much due to our 3-year-old twin boys.) The key to living a FULL life with them vs. just a busy one is thinking & LIVING outside of the box. We choose to unschool our kids so that we can be with them as MUCH as possible when we aren’t working, and even when we are! They are under out feet & making messes, but they make us laugh to tears, they smother us with kisses, and make our heart want to BURST. They teach us more about life than we teach them.

I won’t say that I don’t feel frustrated/sad about not getting to fully pursue my own dreams like childless people can, but then I look at what I have, what God has given us, and nothing in the world compares to that. This incredible love magnified & multiplied by 7 is irreplacable. I wouldn’t change my life for the world. And it’s pretty amazing that Jeromy & I get to show them what true love looks like & inspire them to love people & change the world. You will want THEM to live a life of passion, so show them what that looks like!

xoxo

Christina - We waited until 30 to have kids. I was focusing on a career I don’t even have anymore, lol. But, we knew we were ready. It just switched on day from “not ready” to “We want a kid”. Then it was “we want another one” It was during the pregnancy of our second son that I started my photography business. While working FT at my old career. It was hard, but with a supportive husband, belief in yourself & God, and good old fashioned hard-a$$ work, you can do anything. I now have a thriving business and two amazing little boys that suck the energy out me, but fill me with the most amazing love, joy and pride I have ever felt. You figure it out and make it work. It just happens. You don’t plan for it. As a matter of fact the more you plan, the less that plan works, lol. I still don’t sleep through the night with the youngest and he’ll be a year in two weeks. But I shoot weddings, double wedding weekends, edit, blog, and take time to go to the zoo and bake cookies. You figure it out. You aren’t alone, you have an amazing hubby. So it’s fine. Because the two of you together can do anything. As long as you trust each other and God.

Anna Joy - I run my own sewing company, the head designer for a photography company, do a little bit of freelance work on the side, and am getting my b.a. in graphic design. All of this plus raising a 3 year old boy. Somehow I balance it all. I’m not sure how…but it all works out. Wake up really early and go to bed really late. If God gives you a baby, know that he’ll make a way for both motherhood and career woman.

Tracy - Here’s the thing. You don’t really “give up” or sacrifice anything when you have kids (aside from sleep the first few months.) Hear me out. From the moment you find out you’re pregnant your priorities shift dramatically. Combine that with the truly awesome love you experience by having kids, and you don’t even remember the things that used to consume your life. Sure. You’ll have a bad day (all of us do, even those moms who seem so perfectly put together) and think about life before baby. But like reminiscing about any prior stage of your life, the benefits of the present far outweigh those of the past so you don’t really give it a second thought.

- Mom of a 2 year old, marketing director by day, photographer on night and weekends, and killer of plants as well.

Nikki - We have a 3 (Epic) and 4 (Danger) year old who ROCK MY WORLD. Both my husband and I are are self employed, I’m a photographer he’s a business consultant. I think for us the big thing to be honest is to just raise awesome kids. Our daughter has a desk beside mine and she works on her art while I edit and work on mine. You learn to be more efficient because every minute really does count. And you take on a little less for a little more. There’s also the option of getting a Nanny that travels with you. Take a look at Our Labor of Love. They rock work life balance with their kids like PRO’s

Alexandra Evjen - xoxo! =)

Susan - Um…I have two young children and a very successful photography business. You DO NOT have to give up your career. The fact that you own your own business makes it even that more doable. Yes, kids changes things, but in a good way. You will learn to work it out and manage. Kids are not the end of your professional life. And you don’t have to stop working for 20 years! LOL!

Kelly Braman - When we set our focus on God and His desires for our life we Can Never Go Wrong! I am a little mama to two very active boys and it is awesome and super challenging! If you really think about it though…anything in life that is worth doing is awesome and challenging;) Your story will be unique to you, but one thing is for certain…your heart will forever be changed! You will have a love for your child and a new found love for your husband that you never thought possible and you will never sleep again! ha Sorry about the last part, just keepin it real;) May God bless you and honor your open heart! xo

Veronica - If only I had the strength and wisdom you are blessed with at your age. As I’m 32 with 5 children ages 16,13,12,10,7… 3 girls and 2 boys. Life with children started at 16 for me. I completed high school (on time), journied off to college, got married and had more babies! As my youngest was a miracle, I felt blessed as in this was the path GOD choose for me, not me. I am returning to school (Aveda Institute Phoenix) my family (husband and children) are so supportive and my cheerleaders! I can only tell you that I be ame the mother I am today because of the path God choose for me. I don’t look back and say if I didn’t I’d be here or there… I have a supportive husband who works crazy hours in the summer and is home in the winter, as I’m able to be a Domestic Engineer (stay at home mother). For you promise I think God has plans for you and your business might grow into another direction, bigger than you ever thought! Dont fear the unknown imbrace it!

Stephanie - So glad I clicked on this post….it was nice to hear someone else going through the same thing/questions as I am. I am almost 30, married and have a photography business. My husband and I have been having the same questions about having kids. I believe having a business will be a blessing and beneficial in the long run while having kids but is so scary at the same time. I think God will make it happen in his own timing:)

Erin - Hi Promise- I was married in Sept of 2007 and pregnant in May of 2008- and it was a HUGE surprise. I panicked, grew anxious and made myself crazy googling all sorts of baby related things. By the time I had accepted that I was pregnant and there was no turning back- we found out we were having TWINS! And I was 5 months along by the way. So here I am almost 4 years later and pregnant again (with one baby) and it was very planned. I am a full time designer by day, and freelance at night. I honestly could do the freelance gig at night when my kids were little- they went to bed at 7 and I had a chance to work. But now that they are older and up later, my freelance time has whittled down to nothing. But- I still have my daytime career- which means having my kids in daycare…but, I need that outlet. Staying at home would make me crazy. I just have to “turn off” my work mode as soon as I pick up the kids from daycare and not think about design until 8am the next day. So yes, no longer are the days of carefree travel, but I got that out of my system in my 20′s and I know I will travel again- I just accept that it won’t be for awhile yet and I’m ok with that. You will never regret having kids, but you might regret not having them.

Dallas Curow - First of all, thank you Promise for your honesty and talking about what so many of us working, ambitious women are worrying about. I share your exact same thoughts and concerns. S

Secondly, thanks to all the mamas who’ve given hope and great advice. You’re an inspiration!

Lastly, I’ve found that what helps me lately is finding “parent role models,” and by this I mean friends or acquaintances who have children and still live their lives to the fullest, which includes working. It helps to have people to whom you can aspire to be like. I try to choose people who are like me, and value creativity, friendship, and being active – basically, just not throwing in the towel on life once they have kids. So, if you guys are choosing your parent role models, choose wisely

The New Diplomats Wife - I had the same conversation just a couple of years ago. But here’s the thing. If you have a big heart, you’ll be a great mother. And if you love what you do, there’s no reason to stop doing it. The balance of things will change, sure, but that’s not necessarily bad. You’ll find hours you never knew you had and joys you never knew existed. Trust me, these things work out – sometimes, being ready is just being open.

MixedMolly - You do have more energy when you are younger!! I have a harder time keeping up with a toddler now than I did eight years ago I have three and I did quit full time work for the past 8 years to focus on raising them and being with them while they were little. I have always held a part time work from home job. Now they are all getting into school and I am starting back as a freelancer/small business owner. I found that my focus and interests changed in those eight years. The experiences that I had helped me to see better how God designed me, and the talents he has given me that I didn’t know about before. I have found that being a work from home mom works best with my husband’s job and our desire for our family. God has perfect timing, and I would encourage you to leave it up to Him to decide what is the right time. I think you will find that a baby brings more inspiration and deeper emotion than you’ve ever known, and God will use him or her to refine your character and reveal His design of you.

I also highly recommend the book Sacred Parenting.

Tiffany Vaughan - Hi Promise,

It took 5 years of trying & crying to get our beautiful daughter Avery Rose (by IVF). She is the reason I became a photographer 4 years ago. It had always been an interest to me, but she was the fuel that ignited my passion for this amazing profession. You find time, trust me

Marci - I will not lie: raising three kids with an awesome spouse while running a small business and caring for a lovable dog is. a. challenge. Daily. But seriously with God as the center of our marriage and family, I have more conversations with Jesus in the span of ten hours than I ever did before we had kids. God is AWESOME and I could not do half the things I accomplish without trusting Him and taking time to listen. Yes, having a baby (by birth or adoption) WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE. And it will still be an amazing life, just different than the one you know now. Your heart will grow x10 with every sweet little face added to your family.

Whenever it happens, you and Brian will make AMAZING, fun, adoring, concerned, lovable, responsible, memory-making, maybe slightly-overprotective-of-this-crazy-world-because-we-love-you, kind of parents. And you will all look beautiful in photographs.

p.s. Plant raising is over-rated and not at all related to child rearing. I am proof!

Bonnie - Things change when you have kids and you will feel differently and wonder why you felt this way to start with. I have three, we homeschool and I run my bakery business. Life is constantly changing and seasons of life call for different things but we make it work. Just follow God’s leading and let Him do the worrying.

Elaine - We have 1, just 1 right now because I, like you was like “wait, no, I’m happy with life right now, I’m busy and working… and was living in Italy at the time (Sigh, I miss it so much) Sorry, anyhow… Our son was a surprise! And baby = immediate move back to USA to a state (Italy to Utah = CULTURE SHOCK!)and town where we knew no one and that was just the start of a long, stressful and sometimes lonely road. It’s been SO hard, but here we are 3 years later. Our son Daniel is AMAZING and beautiful and smart. I’ve started my business again from scratch and while we don’t get out as much anymore, our home is full of LOVE and JOY. My husband is super supportive and we share in the responsibilities of everything. When I have to shoot a Wedding, Daniel knows it’s “Daddy Day!” and they plan something special (park, plane museum, etc.) You learn to look far beyond yourself and God stretches you DAILY. But it’s worth it. And know that you are NOT ALONE in the feeling fearful of losing self, freedom and the lifestyle you currently have. It’s normal whether people admit it or not. I think when the time comes and God delivers this gift, you and Brian will be surprised how natural some of the changes come. Best wishes! XOXO

amber - i was never able to keep plants alive either
and one of the horrors of my life was that i could not save my own mother when she became ill.
i had no idea what or how to do with a baby. i was great with other people’s kids-but truly enjoyed being able to hand them back over.
when i found out i was pregnant-i was terrified. i was suddenly responsible for another human being. i was scared every minute and tried to do everything the ‘right’ way for so long.
my beautiful daughter is 3 now and the thing is-she has made it easy to be her mom. we have learned together. she has taught me more about myself than i ever could have imagined.
there are many days when i feel like i will scream if i hear even one more ‘mommy! mommy!’ (and i am NOT a stay at home parent-i do actually ‘escape’ to work 4 days a week)
there are days when she will suddenly stop playing and look over and say ‘mommy i love you so much’. those are the times my heart melts and i know that no matter what i do right or wrong-i am ding exactly what i was supposed to do. i am in the place i was meant to be
i was 34 when she was born and had lived a lot of life before her. i have never felt i missed out on anything and was so ready when she arrived in my life-despite the terror i felt at the same time perhaps i might have had more physical energy if she had been born when i was younger-but emotionally & spiritually i would have had far less to offer her
having an amazing husband to share the journey with has been a blessing as well.

Kristi - My husband and I just celebrated our 9th wedding anniversary last month and I’m pregnant with our first child–due in December. We have always been so focused on work, and our various projects and felt that was more of our calling (we both work in marketing at a Christian university–I’m a creative director, we also worked in youth ministry for 6 years, and my husband now runs a Christian camp through the university that is focused on living out lives of Christian service. We also have a non-profit that focuses on using creative projects to do good.) We’re also just SO happy with just the two of us–it’s always been enough and not having children has given us the freedom to travel, to get my master’s in photography, to do a ton of freelance photography and design, to start the non-profit, etc. I turned 31 this year and thought, well, maybe we’re ready, maybe we should at least start “trying” because it took all of our friends awhile to get pregnant, and BAM, we got pregnant immediately! Our friends say God was just waiting for his chance. We see it as gift, but I’m also terrified. It’s just such a major change in our lives and everyone keeps telling me it’s going to be amazing, but as a person who works so much, gets SO much out of my job, and plans to go back to work after the baby comes, I already feel really torn. It’s just so much to process right now, and I’m not sure the 9 months of pregnancy is quite enough to prepare me for it! I know once he is here and I hold him, everything will be okay, but it’s a huge decision and I don’t know if I ever would have really been ready to take this on, if God hadn’t made it happen so quickly for us (no lie–the day before we found out we were pregnant I told my husband maybe we should wait another year, ha!) It’s taking a lot of faith and a lot of trust in God that he knows best for us, and I know he has a great purpose for our son, and that’s what’s getting me through the transition. Just focus on loving your husband and spending as much time growing as a couple and trusting in God.

Shar - Hey there,
Im 39 and actually just raised two sons. Im actually newly an empty nester in a way. One turned 18 other is 16 1/2 and went to live with his Dad.

I had them around age 20 and 23. I wanted to be a mom and have kids. At the same time. I had no real focus for my life, if that strangely makes sense. I found my value in my husband and kids but had no personal interests, love, joys, passions of my own. I did not travel, go to school, see sites, explore hobbies, I pretty much met my husband at age 16 and made him the center of the universe, which is also not healthy.

Its always a balance. Im going to be turning 40 soon and i feel like im just now graduating high school! As far as the freedom I will experience. The world is now open as far as travel, hobbies, interests, time to myself, etc etc. And I admit Im excited about this chapter. I love my kids dearly, but Im also going to speak realistically, raising kids in todays world is HARD. And raising teenagers is NOT rewarding a lot of the time, depending on the child.

I started up my own business while raising toddlers, mainly because I think I reached a point as a Mom where I wanted something that was mine, something creative and a place and things for me to do that separated me still and made me an individual.

I went back to school, I took them on small trips.

I was scared to have the first one when I found out, and we were not financially ready AT ALL. But as many will tell you “nobody would ever have kids if they waited till they were ready” emotionally, financially, etc. None of us have all our dream life lined up often times.

Women have children at all ages today. I have many friends who had kids in their 40s. One has 3 kids, has just gotten her masters, works as a teacher, is an artist, she does it all, but its her ADD personality that is diffferent then many others and shes been living as a single mom for years and juggles it all.

I think it all depends on the person, there is no right age, heck the Lord gave Hannah a baby in old age!

I guess I just want to urge you to not do anything or follow anything because its what others think you “should” do, we are all individual or unique. Your life will change with children, I wouldnt say its a bad thing, its different, and you adapt and roll with it.

Culturally a lot of people and places view children differently and the emphasis placed on having them is different. And church ladies can be some of the most annoying on “When are you having a baby?” talk, haha…

I just “had” my kids, no active plan and Ive seen people do more in their lives and careers first then “Plan” a child and I do think the desire is different, not that either is right or wrong, but I have known women who are more ready to have a child and planned to take a break from career for time with a baby and eagerly embrace it.

Now my personal opinion? Ha! Enjoy life with your husband and travel and be crazy and have fun! Stay up late and sleep in because that will a luxury of the past once kiddies come along.

Shannon Von Eschen - Hi Promise! I have followed you for awhile and love everything you are, do, and stand for. I just had recently started my wedding photography business in 2010 and then was pregnant in early 2011. We had our baby in October of 2011 and while our lives have been completely different, there are SO many things that have made having him worth it. It IS a gift from God. Your heart opens wider and fills with more love than you’ve ever known possible. And it’s hard to explain until you’re there. I think that no one ever really feels like all their ducks are in a row, and certainly lots of my own things have taken a back seat (albeit a small one!) for just a bit because I find him so much more important. Less that he’s keeping me from things, but more so that I’m choosing to let go of some work just be with him! =) I know I have no idea what your life is really like, but from an outsider perspective, I feel like you have your business in a perfect spot! You run it flawlessly and easily and I feel confident that a baby wouldn’t inhibit anything you (or your amazingly talented husband) want to do just based on the personalities you two exude. =) Having a baby changes you…but it makes you better. I spend more time thinking & writing about him on my blog now than anything else. You want to see a cute baby? Peruse my blog on a sleepless night: shalynneimaging.blogspot.com. I have been especially blessed with an EASY child (it’s a bit ridiculous really!) but still, yours (should it happen) will be the greatest gift as well! *Thinking of you*

Vanessa - I don’t normally comment on things, but wanted to let you know you’re not alone. My husband and I are entering our 30s in the coming months, and kids are still a question mark…I feel differently on different days. Some days I want my own, some days I want to adopt, and some I don’t want any at all! And making it worse are the people who pressure, whether they intend to or not. Every comment that I’d be a wonderful mother (which I greatly appreciate!) brings tears to my eyes because I have no idea when or how or even if that will happen. And comparison is certainly the thief of joy; I often feel left behind watching our friends have and raise kids.
All I know is what helps me, and that’s remembering that I can’t compare my life to others’, and praying for/trusting in/being open to God’s leading. I made a note from my reading the other day: “Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.” (Psalm 27:14) and another from Psalm 33 that “We wait in hope”.
Thank you for sharing on this and inviting us to do the same.

Meghan - I would love to read through everyone’s response, but seeing as it is almost midnight and I finally got my 3 1/2 year old to bed a little more than 10 minutes ago, I’ll just have to be quick about it.

The one thing I can say that maybe no one else has yet is that I am a better mom because I work. Yes, it is so much work than one can make a ful-time job out of it. But God will supply everything that YOU need, everything that Promise and Brian need. I need to work, not just as a mom but on a job that I’m passionate about. I wasn’t made to be a mom that stayed at home all day long and didn’t have the relief of taking Teaghan to the babysitter to have quiet time to just work my heart out.
And it wasn’t until I became a mom that my design career curtailed into a passion for photography. And I’m building that on top of having a full time job AND being M.O.M. But God supplies, and as long as I wait on Him and all these blessings He has for me instead of running ahead and killing myself to be perfect on every level, then it’s a pretty amazing ride. Being a parent is simple. I didn’t say easy, but simple. When I get that kid in bed safely at night, and she’s on her way to dreamland in the safety of my watch, then I’ve done my job.

And most importantly, you will understand how much God loves each of us like you never have before when you become a mother (and a father too, Brian.)

xoxo

sandra - I too am wired to “work” or be involved with something I am passionate about. The first 2 years of my sons life I had a high stress career and knew I wanted to be self employed. I am a happier working mom this way. We were married 2 years before were serious about it and 3 years before I had my son. I was 30. It’s a transformation like no other so I can’t even put it into words. You just learn to leverage your time. It’s not easy as pie, but the love you have fills your every breath. Whether it’s because your happy OR frustrated. Oh and when you are ready (and trust yourself) the ovulation tests (the pee sticks) really do work!

Arlene Chambers - I am realizing you are never ready…there is no right or wrong…as NIKE says ‘Just do it’ and somehow each morning you get up and do just that ‘it’…whatever that looks like!! Somedays are better than others and a new perspective is always welcome. NO better words than ‘one day at a time’ but sometimes its truly one minute, one hour, one activity. Love your stuff Promise…the time will be right when it happens (even if it doesn’t feel like it).

Summer Dotinga - You make it all work. Kids are a game changer and what is important sans kids won’t be so important with kids but all the cliche’s people say about children are TRUE! And the sacrifices you make to have them are ALL WORTH IT, I promise this is true. Don’t feel pressure, but I will tell you…. You will never have kids if you wait to have enough money, the perfect home, enough time etc. You just have to leap and have fun on the way down.

Sally - Promise, no book, no one can prepare you except the ONE. Seriously, when I had 1 child, I was overwhelmed and became a bit more successful. 10 years later, we had another one, tried for, but not expected, and I became more successful, 3 years after that, another unexpected gift, and well, my career is at a plateau, but my heart and life are more successful than any career or accolades I could hope for. I cant even remember the trials I had trying to balance career and family, I know I had some, but I have pictures and memories of my sweet babies, family vacations, joys of watching my kids be creative like me. I love it. My crazy, chaotic, fulfilling life. I promise one day you will be up late after everyone has gone to bed echoing the same thing to another potential mommy.

Melinda - My mom had me at 18 and I turned out fine! But then again, my fiance’s parents had him in their 30s and honestly, he had a WAY better childhood because of it (home-cooked meals every night, a mom that stayed home with him, etc.) But good luck with whatever you choose!!

AJ - Hi Promise, I linked here from Kelli Murray’s blog. I have 5 kids, and run a full time business. I’m sort of the opposite of you, I had my oldest in high school. Then I met my husband a few years later, and we had 5 more kids (one passed away). When I was young, I used to tell people I didn’t want kids, I wanted to travel, work in a creative field, and see the world. It didn’t work out in that order, but it sure did work out. My kids have inspired me in ways that I never imagined. There are days that are really hard, really challenging, but there are days that are just so awesome and irreplaceable too! Through my children, I found photography and design, through the passing of my beautifu daughter Mya, I found NICU and bereavement photography, through my son and daughter, I started designing and creating a line of dolls and clothing that is now my full time job. They inspire me, they make me cry, they make me laugh, and so many other things. Now that they are here, I honestly cannot imagine my life without them.

Atteb - Promise, you guys HAVE to have kids! What the world needs is more creative, God-fearing, spirit-filled parents like yourselves to redefine how children are raised in this world. You will be such a blessing to so many beyond your own kids. Just look at how many people you have inspired through this blog! You are an amazing woman of God and I can’t wait to see what He does through your life.

Jenn - I absolutely LOVE this post. It’s funny, before I met my hubby, I {NEVER} wanted to get married, OR have kids. I worked so much just to make money. Then I met him, and he flipped my world upside-down! I didn’t graduate from college I just worked so we could save for a wedding and house. 6 months after we got married we bought a house and I ended up being 6 weeks pregnant. Not in the plan, but we were WAY excited! We got pregnant with our second and I cried-I wasn’t ready for another baby (both times we got pregnant we were not trying to get pregnant. I took as a sign from God that this is what he wanted for us. We were NOT financially ready for 2 kids. I have been working full time since I’ve been 18 and yes, daycare is expenseive, but somewhow we got through it all. I didn’t realize how strong my passion was for photography until I had children and now that they are getting older I have been able to dabble in starting a photography business. I feel that even though I was young when I started having children and worked full time through it all, I can still fulfill my passions and dreams. It may not happen as quickly as I like, but I have a chance to have the best (and worst-sometimes) of both worlds. Having children was more amazing that I ever thought it would be. I have the most amazing husband who has made every experience more enjoyable! Good Luck!

Trina Holden - Although I grew up with the goal to be a mommy, and never planned on a career, my blog eventually became something I had to balance with my motherhood (to three littles 5 and under) much like a part time job. It was a daily battle, full of failure, resentment (toward my children! horrors!), and stress.

‘Til I asked God to change my heart. Toward my children (’cause, hello, that WAS my original priority). And He answered. Heart change is the answer to fighting the balance. I still blog. I still do the social media thing (sortof), I still occasionally wonder off to some lovely, new blog (like yours), but when my computer time is over, I rejoice instead of resent it.

I guess we have to pray for our hearts to be in the right place, because rules and schedules and boundaries will only work so much. So, pray for God to put your heart where His is for you right now. Maybe He is already preparing your heart for motherhood?

Oh, and you’re so right to be thinking about it like this. ‘Cause it’s as big and wonderful as you dream it could be.

Jennifer - I can’t really comment on the whole baby thing as I am SOO far away from that.

I did just want to let you know that your images show up HUGE in an rss feed, like huge-i-have-to-scroll-to-see-the-whole-thing huge.

jen - It’s definitely a WAY good thing to be thinking things through and talk talk talk about it before ) But, the cool thing about God’s gift(s)…..kiddos….being a momma….is that He has a plan for you and your family that you can’t really fathom or really know everything about just yet. I have two kiddos….pets…a big kid (or pet, however i look at my husband on a given day ) and just find it all such a cool journey He’s taken me on, us on….the good and the not so good….all so incredibly worth it. It sounds like you and your hubby have the essential ingredients that are awesome for this gift when it is given. Excited for you, regardless. Huge hugs to you guys.